Where did all the energy and accomplishment of youth go? Twenty years ago if my time was as occupied as now the list of deeds done would have been prodigious. Lately my wheels spin and my engine revs but the old jalopy barely gets out of the driveway and never seems to make the trip to town.
Cross-country treks are no longer on the chart for this vehicle. My maps have been folded and tucked in the glove box. There never was a great amount of wanderlust in my heart so off-road jaunts didn't tempt me much. This conveyance was neither sports model nor 4-wheel drive jungle buggy. I was around-town station wagon in nature. Now my tires are tread-bare and my paint is peeling, my windshield is cracked, and the upholstery? Thank goodness for tinted glass! The maintenance record shows an alarming case of neglect. What, you have to put oil and transmission fluid in this thing?
The car still runs but somewhere along the highway the engine lost compression. It rumbles and chugs but doesn't seem to add any miles to the odometer. Leaving the metaphor behind, what this means is that I keep busy but don't seem to get much done. I read, write, relp, do my chores, etc... but everything seems to take more time than it once did. I wander from one project to another without ever catching up. What is worse, I care less and less about completing things. Goal oriented, focussed, and organized once described me and remains my expectation of myself. Now I contemplate turning off the key and letting the junker rust in the yard.
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